creation, random thoughts and other imponderables

as a child, bed time was an entrance into
the world of the mind. waiting in the dark
for sleep to claim me, my mind would wander,
i might became one of the "famous five", travelling
in a caravan, high adventure. i admired george,
the tom boyish, girl creation of the author
enid blyton. strangely enough "the secret seven"
never held the same fascination for me!
george might well have been my first crush ...

nope, incorrect recollection! my first girl crush was
my very first teacher when i started school,at
age four(before i could read).

bedtime was this dark, safe place where i learned
to travel with my mind.

for many years, i gave attention to god and the
size of the universe. to the begining of creation.
all things begin, all things end...
god created the earth.
who or what created the creator?
we have our world, our universe.
what was there before ...
nothingness? what is nothingness?
what lies beyond?
if all things end, what lies beyond the end?
hmmm ...

as i approached puberty, i decided that some questions
might have answers way beyond our mortal understanding.
it occured to my young mind that if i continued to
dwell on these questions ...
i might go insane!
some mysteries are beyond solving. some questions beyond
answers.
and anyway, my hormones were fluctuating, there were
more pressing matters on my mind.

so where was i going with all this...
well, i am on my second reading of eckhart tolle's
"a new earth". now there is a man who has given a thought
or two to a thing or two! he always challenges me! reading
eckhart requires concentration and consideration. i will
probably read and reread his work until my eyes no longer see.

i think i have always pretty much understood that "i" was
neither my body, my beautiful mind nor my somewhat chaotic
thought process.
i understood the indestructible essence of energy,
the possibility of an immortal soul, the undeniable
existence of racial memory and the unfortunate proclivity
of man to pass our pain from generation to generation.
mr tolle just says it all so beautifully!
he reminds me that i am more ...