life, truth, the pursuit of happiness

life, truth, the pursuit of happiness ... a matter of perception

i wonder why it took me so long to realize ... life simply "is". through my childhood years, the traumatic teenage times, in fact, most of my adult life, i believed. i believed that if i was "good", prayed fervently and believed without question, the world would arrange itself to suit my needs and desires. i was fortunate, for many, many years my life unfolded in a deliciously satisfying way. in 1994 all that changed ... lesson time ... hard times, sad times, chaos ruled.some things, simply are, life simply is. i have the ability to, love, strive, cogitate. i may even attempt to influence the circumstances of my life. the unpalatable truth is ... i am master only of my thoughts and emotions, even they are prey to hormonal flux, to pain and illness. eventually i have found my answer, my peace, in acceptance. i am who i am, life is as it is. my road to contentment now by passes such questions as "why me?", my map reads "why not me?" i still make plans, i still live with hope, i have learned not to insist that my way is the right or only way. when companionship, love or passion are offered i will relax into them with great joy. life's ramble will always be easier and much more fun if someone is there to hold my hand and share my road.

truth ... i believed was an absolute. not so, another lesson... truth is a variable. my truth is influenced by the circumstances of my life, my perceptions and memory ... as is the truth of every living soul. you and i may experience an identical situation, i will believe myself to be an innocent whilst you may well believe me to be an imbecile. neither person is wrong, neither a liar, nor a manipulator of the truth.we both speak the truth, we differ only because we do not share a common perception of the incident. perhaps the biblical directive "judge not, lest you be judged" refers to this unenviable situation. "the truth" is not an absolute, truth is a living, changing essence. you will generally speak "your truth" with honour, the fact that "my truth" differs does not make either one of us less than honest. perhaps as very young children, with a clean slate when it comes to the experiences of life ... perhaps then we might have blurted out "the truth" on occasion. other than in those circumstances i very much doubt that "the truth" exists.

the pursuit of happiness ... i would hazard a guess that "the pursuit of happiness" might well be an enormous waste of time and effort. chasing happiness, even stretching out a hand in an effort to grasp the darn thing is probably a wrong move.happiness is an elusive emotion which arrives and leaves our lives pretty much under it's own steam. some folks have very little ...and yet, they are satisfied, content with their lot in life ...happiness often comes to rest at their centre. then again, we have enormously wealthy people, disatisfied with their life and circumstance ... bound and determined to be miserable. happiness would tend to skulk warily beyond their boundaries. happiness is an empirical emotion both precious and fleeting. i would suggest that happiness is the state of being over which we have the least control. an emotion of the moment, learn to live in the moment. striving and wishing will not add the value of happiness to our lives. seek the quiet certitude of contentment, allow serenity to rule, enjoy that which you have and love where your heart leads you. lend your strength to those who have need, draw strength from those who offer a strong shoulder to lean on.
open your ears to the young and the elderly, listen and hear... wisdom without piety. make yourself a safe and welcoming destination for happiness and it may well decide to settle.

we don't see things as they are, we see things as we are.
-Anais Nin